May I ask you a question? What hard thing are you doing?
Stop and think about your answer before continuing.
Did you stop and think
about it? Nope, I didn’t think so. So, seriously, pause and consider this
question before moving on.
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Now, did you stop and think about your answer? Ok, good. I’m
assuming you did.
This question keeps surfacing in my mind. It’s part of our
human nature and our culture's expectation to avoid doing hard things. Do what’s
easy. Live for the moment. Why work hard when you don’t need to?
When I was a teenager, I read an amazingly challenging book
by Alex and Brett Harris titled “Do Hard Things.” Ever since then, I’ve tried
to avoid dwelling in my comfort zone. To grow and stretch myself. To do hard things.
One of the things they emphasized was to do what’s hard for you. Getting
straight A’s in college. Easy – for me. It may have looked like I was doing hard
things to others, but often I wasn’t. And that’s where Alex and Brett
challenge their readers – find somethings that’s hard for YOU and then do it;
don’t just give the appearance of doing hard things to be recognized by others.
I’m in the midst of reading two books right now – Counter Culture
by David Platt and The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime by Mark Haddon. Both books address doing hard things. Counter Culture focuses on doing hard things
for Jesus with regards to our views and actions relating to abortion, sexuality,
human trafficking, ethnicity, public display of religion, marriage,
immigration, orphans and widows, and poverty. The Curious Incident of the Dog
in the Nighttime focuses on an autistic child and life from his perspective. One parent
gives up on him and takes the easy way out – an affair and disappearance from
the boy’s life. The other parent sticks it out, even though he doesn’t always
understand or relate to his son.
This year has held many hard things – uprooting every month,
living in multiple locations, watching friends go through difficult life
situations, being depressed, family living far away, transitioning from being
somebody’s to being single, hours of commuting, totaling my
vehicle, and trying to build new friendships. These are hard things, but they aren't "doing hard things." Doing hard things is more about responding in ways you'd naturally not, setting goals for yourself, and challenging the status quo. So, in the above examples, doing hard things is more about having a good attitude, initiating friendships, finding joy in the circumstances, negotiating a new vehicle with the car dealership in the middle of my surgery rotation, driving 9 hours in one weekend to see my family for 1.5 days, following up with friends, and not letting myself become bitter or passive.
So, what does doing hard things look like to me currently?
Moving beyond my introverted self and investing in other people’s lives,
initiating conversations, not avoiding difficult situations, getting up every day with a positive attitude, being diligent in my devotional
time and Bible reading, staying physically active (training for a half marathon
although I really don’t enjoy running), having hard conversations, saying NO to the good and YES to the
best, thinking about the future and starting the job search even though I’d
rather be passive and let things just happen, and letting others truly know me.
Each person’s hard thing looks different. It could be giving
an honest answer, not giving up on your kids, picking up the phone and talking
to someone rather than texting them, asking that co-worker how she is doing, picking
up extra groceries for the food pantry even though it might dip into your “fun
money,” making that job switch, asking someone to dinner, getting up off the
couch and walking 10 minutes, taking the stairs instead of the elevator,
refusing to complain when it would be so easy, or letting yourself be
vulnerable for your own good. The main thing is that it is something HARD for
YOU.
So, that’s my challenge.
Choose something HARD to do.
Commit
to it. Keep at it. And if you fail, try again.
I know I am.
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